An elderly couple was attending church services. About halfwayA hilot healer comes to mind...
through she leans over and says, "I just had a silent fart what do you
think I should do?"
He replies "Put a new battery in your hearing aid."
Wow, much of the stuff coming out of the UK inspires some serious head shaking. Work out the math compared to the commercial cost listed at the end of the article.
Police spend £20,000 on cardboard officers
Police forces have spent more than £20,000 on cardboard cut-outs of uniformed officers designed to confuse criminals.
By David Barrett, Home Affairs Correspondent
Last Updated: 4:25PM GMT 03 Feb 2009
Cardboard cut-out of a policeman used to help deter shoplifters Photo: PA
It was billed as the latest police tactic to combat crime and now the idea has taken off nationwide.
Police figures show that forces across the country have spent more than £20,000 on the flat-pack PCs.
West Midlands police said it had ordered 80 cardboard constables at a cost of just over £10,000. In Derbyshire, £6,650 was spent over the past two years on a "substantial number" of cut-outs.
"The theory is that it creates the impression at first glance of a capable guardian being on site, which hopefully also reduces the perception of fear of crime," said a Derbyshire police spokesman.
A survey using the Freedom of Information Act revealed that 13 forces in England and Wales have used cardboard officers.
Essex police said it spent £760 on eight cut-outs. They have been deployed in petrol stations, to deter drivers from speeding away without paying for their fuel, and also in shops to discourage shoplifting.
The force would not reveal precisely where the cut-outs have been placed because "to release locations is likely to jeopardise the success of the trials".
Cleveland police spent £1,760 on cardboard officers for use in shops, petrol stations and retail parks in Hartlepool, Redcar and Stockton-on-Tees.
The other forces which have used cut-outs are North Wales, South Wales, Greater Manchester, Durham, Humberside, Lancashire, Avon and Somerset, Norfolk and Surrey.
Rank-and-file officers, however, questioned the wisdom of spending police funds on fake officers.
Simon Reed, vice-chairman of the Police Federation, said: "While I appreciate that money may be tight for policing, this does seems a drastic solution to avoid paying any salary and pension costs.
"Ultimately it will be for local residents to decide if cardboard police officers work for their community and are good use of their taxes."
Several forces admitted to having suffered the theft of cut-outs. Three went missing from filling stations in Derbyshire in the past two years, while two were stolen in Cleveland.
Humberside reported the theft of one cardboard officer, which disappeared from a Tesco supermarket in Grimsby last November.
A spokesman for West Midlands police, which had the highest spending on cut-outs, said that some of the money would be reclaimed from shops which benefited from the scheme, but could not say how much had been recouped so far.
South Wales police created life-size replicas of two of its serving officers, community support officer Helen Ely and neighbourhood constable Dale Weaver.
Surrey produced cardboard replicas of an entire neighbourhood policing team to reassure residents and increase awareness of crime-prevention measures.
Commercially-produced promotional cut-outs can cost from £12 and £30 each.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/politics/lawandorder/4410417/Police-spend-20000-on-cardboard-officers.html
Baby Accidentally Dials 911, Leads To Arrest Of Father
It is May 20, after all.
(http://www.sculu.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-o-matic/cache/b0b35_moe.jpg)
(http://milocat.files.wordpress.com/2009/05/ham.jpg)
(http://thebsreport.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/mr_ed3.gif)
http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=cb6_1274737601
Inbread Cat
(http://www.freepostia.com/fimages/348oeBgQ_image.jpg)
Suppose this could go in the martial arts section but I did say WTF when they pulled out the cucumber.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jcv381pDS4w&feature=player_embedded
Pretty amusing:
http://deadstate.org/here-are-31-of-the-most-ironic-moments-ever-caught-on-camera/
Krugman and Bernanke are walking down the street and see a pile of dog shit. Bernanke says “I’ll give you twenty thousand dollars to eat that pile of shit.” Krugman does it, gets paid, and they keep walking. After a while they see another pile of shit on the road. Seeing an opportunity for revenge, Krugman says “Tell you what, I’ll give YOU twenty grand to eat that pile of shit.” Bernanke does it, Krugman gives him back the money, and they keep walking. After a while Bernanke says “I’m feeling pretty sick. We both ate shit and neither of us is any richer.” Krugman answers “You’re missing the bigger picture. We’ve increased GDP by forty thousand dollars and created two jobs.”
Krugman and Bernanke are walking down the street and see a pile of dog shit. Bernanke says “I’ll give you twenty thousand dollars to eat that pile of shit.” Krugman does it, gets paid, and they keep walking. After a while they see another pile of shit on the road. Seeing an opportunity for revenge, Krugman says “Tell you what, I’ll give YOU twenty grand to eat that pile of shit.” Bernanke does it, Krugman gives him back the money, and they keep walking. After a while Bernanke says “I’m feeling pretty sick. We both ate shit and neither of us is any richer.” Krugman answers “You’re missing the bigger picture. We’ve increased GDP by forty thousand dollars and created two jobs.”
Hahahahaha! Good one, BBG! It might be funnier if it didn't perfectly describe the wisdom guiding current economic policy.
(https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-R_5u5Qgg0Do/W2JH70FCZOI/AAAAAAAAMCo/2LdMHW5xRjoQRrGbnWyOxHZuPpKmaHQAQCLcBGAs/s1600/TomCruise.jpg)
I get the humor of it all, but I am not assuming the accuracy of the dating of the photos or of the data proffered for that matter.
Stace Abrams
from romance novels to movie star:
https://www.conservativereview.com/set-phasers-to-cringe-leftist-ga-gubernatorial-candidate-stacey-abrams-is-president-of-the-united-earth-on-star-trek-and-viewers-head-to-sick-bay-2656980052.html
Speaking of Taylor
https://www.powerlineblog.com/ed-assets/2024/02/Screenshot-2024-02-06-at-7.18.34%E2%80%AFPM.png